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Struggling with Meditation, But Not Quite Finding Your Way

I went looking for ideas outside of myself. I discovered it’s not what the world holds for you, it’s what you bring to it. The dreams dearest to my heart are right here.”

Anne of Green Gables

When I read this, it made me wonder what it really meant and is it possible to get what you need within yourself.  Several years ago, I finally understood what it meant. For me, I needed to look inside of myself to find out what I wanted, ultimately answer the question “Who Am I?”, and what is really important to me.

The answers are always within me. I had forgotten to listen to that voice. People often use different words describing their inner voice or intuition. In this writing, I will be calling it my inner child. One way of finding my inner child that I lost was through meditation. 

You see, I had a certain thought when I heard the word mediation and I didn’t like it when I first tried it. For me, I thought mediation meant sitting quietly in the corner and allowing my mind to settle down. For those who know me well, sitting down and being quiet is not one of my positive attributes. 😊

OH NO…IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE? 

I tried to do this type of meditation, which consisted of yelling at my mind to be quiet and stop thinking. It was a very interesting conversation I had with myself, but oh my, was I exhausted after I “completed” my five-minutes of meditation. To be honest, I wanted to end it in 10 seconds, but I didn’t want to give up. So you can see why I couldn’t understand just what people were talking about when they said meditation was relaxing and calming.

In frustration, I actually stopped mediating until I went to a training course and it was there, I discovered that there are other types of mediation besides sitting quietly for a fixed amount of time. Before I share with you what they are, I think it’s important to define what meditation is.  

According to the Cambridge dictionary, mediation is defined as the “act of giving your attention to only one thing, either as a religious activity or as a way of becoming calm and relaxed,” or “serious thought or study, or the product of this activity.”

This is what I like best – you are practicing relaxation, being present, having moment to moment awareness, and learning to work and settle your mind.

There are many types of mediation and I want to share four of them. They are focused mindfulness, mindfulness meditation, expressive/movement meditation, and mantra meditation.  

  • Focus mindfulness is looking at a particular object such as an image or sound. An example is concentrating using any of your five senses. An example of this sighing meditation. You take a deep breath through your nose slowly for three to five seconds and breathe out through your mouth for three to five second and say “ahh” like you are sighing. Do this for three to five times. See what you notice before and after doing this signing activity.
  • Mindfulness Meditation is paying attention to your thoughts, feelings, and sensations as they arise without focusing on any particular thought, feeling or sensations. You allow it to be with no judgment. Only observations. This is what I thought meditation was.
  • Expressive/Movement Meditation is using active techniques such as chanting, dancing, whirling, and shaking. Some examples of this is taking a slow walk and paying attention to your feet moving up and down or gardening, qigong, and other forms of gentle meditation.
  • Mantra Meditation is using a repetitive sound to clear the mind such as saying Om (Sanskrit) in yoga class.  

When I realized that there are different ways to meditate, I felt a sense of relief and that I actually was doing meditation but didn’t realize it. The one that I use a lot in my current life is the focus mindfulness, specifically the sighing meditation. I’m actually doing this right now while I am writing this.

What I have learned about mediation is the awareness of being present and slowing down. Actually, noticing and feeling my body or the sensations I am feeling especially when I am using one of the types of meditation. Using these different types of meditation in my personal life and my professional life has helped me become more connected with my inner child, be more grounded, and helped me in my journey of self-discovery of who I am and what is important to me. I am noticing that I am calmer and more relaxed.

It was through the introspection of meditation that I was able to understand the quote from Anne of Green Gables. When I notice that I am thinking too much, in my head I use one of these forms of mediation and then journal about it later to see what comes up.

Meditation comes in many forms. What works for me may not work for you. It is up to you to choose. This is one of the ways that I work with my clients. This technique may be helpful during times of uncertainty.

By the way, if you love watching food shows like me, a great show to watch that talks about meditation and food is an Episode of Chef’s Table featuring Jeong Kwan, a 60-year-old Zen Buddhist Nun, who cooks vegan meals. Just watching her felt calming and relaxing to me. Curious what you think about it.

Share with me: What has been your experience with meditation? Out of the four types of meditation I shared, is there a one that seems that could work for you? Is there another type that you prefer?